I over thought…
I have always been very keen about
knowing people and how things change in different periods of life. Being so
inquisitive about it, I have spent around 24 years of life, trying to
understand what the other 24 years would be? Is that a good thing to do?
No...Let me tell you straightway...That’s bad! It’s the worst idea of adventure
that you can ever have in your little life. I have seen people around me, they
enjoy moments and that is the only way to satisfy the soul at every turning
phase of life. There is a rhythm is every second of a day that we pass. Rhythms
are meant to settle down our thoughts. Everything meant to come early is a
little late in the small life that I have lived so far. I am not so old! I
understand that. But I also understand that this is a vast world and the
emotions are in a hurry. They touch you before time and build the schema for
dealing with those emotions at a later phase of life. But there were few schema that were seriously missing out of my life. I had no mechanism to deal
with them. Lately, I have been over thinking I don’t understand how stupid our
thoughts become at times. We are always in the search of the rage and something
that elates us. But it’s funny to know that elation gets ignited from any
little thing existing around us. I know that we can’t impose our desires on
someone who has nothing to do with our lives. But also want to know, if I get
attached to someone, then what could be the possible solutions to get over them.
Attachment is the priceless and a great virtue in the fast world today. We
rarely develop that. I have been passively attached to a person who has nothing
to do with my life. I had never thought of writing about because I know that
this is a not a permanent emotion. But present my state of mind tells that it
is stronger than the permanency that we demand once we fall for someone .I am
totally abstaining from naming it as ‘LOVE’ because I don’t know ..What is
that? This is not to make you feel bad. .This is not for telling that you have
done something wrong, .This is just a manifestation of my unsettled ego. Dear
you, you have done a serious damage to me. Something, that was beyond my
thought. I feel paralyzed and high with emotions at the same Time. There is no
way out to get away with this thinking Just to tell you that if you get to read
this at some point of time in your life...Then you should know that you have
done something that is beyond your reach too. You made me to ‘STAY’. Stay and
get trapped within the same set of thoughts over a long time. I do not mean for
that. My thoughts are never meant to stay... You know how calm it feels to be
around you? It’s like I took a break from the struggle that has been there
inside my mind. I so hate to write about love, things because that’s sounds so
‘LOVBUGGED’ to me. But I am writing and just to tell you that...These are the
first ever straight thoughts that I have written so far. Because I don’t want
to muddle them with the pieces of abstract thinking that you won’t be able to
understand! I over thought...
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